Next Sunday, there will be a minutes silence for the death of the gentleman's game of football at 2:28 yesterday.
A cold blooded murder, witnessed by thousands at Villa Park and around the country through the medium of television, a spokesman for the Chief of Police said "Never in the history of football, has such a calous crime taken place. We are working very hard to identify the suspect, although it appears he is going under the pseudo nym of wa**er in the black".
An independant witness was quoted "He should be ashamed of himself. Nowhere in the referees charter does it say to offer advice during free kicks and that was never a penalty. All cheating cockneys should apologise profusely to their Villa counterparts and hang their heads in shame"