Rare moment of "Doh!" from me I'm afraid Mr Curtis - giggling like a schoolboy as I firmly locked the padlock. Then when the first person said "we haven't got a key" the giggling turned to deep-seated laughter. I then stemmed it when I realised I'm 31 years old and went to get the caretaker.

Sadly I found the caretaker already on his way to turn off the fire alarm which we'd already set off, whereby I had to explain that in the middle of the fire alarm chaos, two of our players had become locked in a cage. Try doing that keeping a straight face. Impossible.

Bloke looked at me like I was joking (tears of laughter running down my face not helping him to believe me), then he wandered into the hall to see Lewis and Crabbeman pressed up against the cage giving me evils while the alarm keeps on ringing and everyone else is doing press ups. Reckon the guy thought he was gonna get tied up and have a pool ball shoved in his mouth... bunch of nutters.