Hands up who's just been talking to the Daily Mirror.... Just me then! We're in tomorrow's edition. And...

I've had to give him all your names, so the following people may need to forewarn their girlfriends that it's just a story...

Tony Ilsley
Matt
Dave Lewis
Adam
Dave Frew
Dave Crabbe
John Sills
John L
Chris Brown

That's it, that's all he needed, I mentioned Steve Tab too for some reason, he must just be in my mind. I told him about you as well Paul, but he said they probably wouldn't print that cos you're married! Didn't tell him about you Smurf, you owe me a pint for that.

Top notch