Sorry I culdn't make it to training last night lads - Genghis took great pleasure in dropping me for this week's match (even though I can't be there anyway).

Good luck on Sunday against Travellers Friend, just remember it's a 90 minute match. You saw how they reacted to going a goal down, but you know their strikers will keep plugging away at you for the full 90 no matter what. You know you can score against them and you know you can keep them out for long periods of time too, so just try and stay switched on and do not under any circumstances let them get you riled. If they're winding you up then you won't win by having a go back at them, you'll win by not doing that. Once you get into the whole "You're gay" "No you're gay" argument it's hard to see a clear winner, but if you get the "You're gay"...









...argument then you'll find you come out on top. I couldn't care what scum like that think about anything, let alone me or anyone I know, in fact if they're having a go at something about me, that makes me happy cos I'd worry more if any of them liked me. So let it go, it's only 90 minutes and if you can get through it without reacting to any of their comments then you're a better person.

The other thing to do is keep telling people when they've done something good, if one of their attacks has come to nothing, be vocal about our good defending, good passing, etc... As that keeps our spirits up and knocks theirs down a bit each time. You can see it happen from the side lines, cos the same happens if they start doing it. Congratulate each other on the good things and motivate each other if they start getting cocky. Do not shy away from it, you don't have to confront them or fight them, you just don't need to hide either.

Paul will already be there, 2nd floor in the 18th Century department in a glass case.

Neil cant bring his Grandparent,will Paul do ?

Browny where are these bloody pictures ?

Cheers Browny (literally) and yes I'll still be here for a few years to come yet, still helping out organising Newquay/Blackpool/wherever and definitely still going to those things too!

For this year's Christmas do for example I was thinking of maybe a day up at the Victoria and Albert Museum in London, then maybe a walk around St Pauls. Partners not invited but bring a grandparent. Fun.

I reckon that must be the hardest level to manage. Sod the pressures of the Premiership, I could handle that with a 7-figure salary, but you think the pressure is any less if you manage Walton & Hersham FC and earn £17,000 a year? You end up in the same place if you're 2nd from bottom at Christmas, you just don't have as much dosh to spend to cheer yourself up.

Give me the role of turning around Blackburn's fortunes at the bottom of the Prem anyday above taking over AFC Wimbledon 8 points clear in the Ryman Div 1 with 2 games in hand... And give me the accompanying paycheque too. Even if Hughes gets sacked after 3 games he'll still have earned more than Dave Anderson (successful AFC boss) gets in a year.

The real money these days is in sex. I'm off to shag David Beckham and sell my story to the paper.

Absolutly gutted to hear that you are calling it a day as manager mate, Have to say though in the 6 years that I have been playing for Controlware/Shefford, we have never had anyone who got the team working together as unit and playing for each other like you have.

I may have dragged alot of players along to training when we were at college but they all have been brilliant, and you got us all playing well together. The divison 2 chapionship and Cup final shows that.
Glad to hear that you are not packing it in completely and are still playing.

As for the future Im sure Mike will also do a fantastic job and we will all give him our full support. (As he has learnt from the best)

Three cheers for Shane, hip hip, HORAY,
hip, hip, HORAY, hip, hip HORAY.

Bellamy For AFC Dons

I think the league win kudos should be shared by everyone, as I really didn't think we would do it and everybody else did. And bizarrely Browny should take some credit as it was him who introduced most of today's squad to the club. But the team spirit thing I am quite proud of as it's maybe the hardest thing to quantify and explain, in the end you can get promoted/relegated or stay mid-table but as long as you've got a good team spirit it doesn't really matter. Helps to win leagues though eh?

AFC drew at the weekend in the league to the team in 2nd place. That's the worst run in the club's history, played 2, lost 1, drawn 1. Sack the board...

Mr Sills it is a well known fact that the majority of United's are from the south probably as all the teams down here are all shite.

Well what can I say, gutted that you wont be managing anymore, but at the same time really pleased that you're still planning to stay around. You can concentrate on your playing career again now...! You have to take a hell of a lot of credit for turning a 2nd division mid table team into a title challanging 1st division team, and being able to keep the team spirit as well.

And Smurfy, lots of Man Utd fans seemed to be heading back south on the M6 and M1 on Sunday evening. Odd That.

The game was pretty poor - Rooney dived but Ronaldo should have had a penalty anyway. Arsenal played better footy but overplayed it. Neither team deserved to score, neither team deserved to win, United won 2-0. Funny old game.

God knows how Neil got his pound to stay in the hole after he twatted it at the ceiling like that.

Very quiet on here today are all the Arsenal boys in hiding.
Can i be the first to say well done and what a great job you have done during the years of your reign,Ghengis will be fine the lads just need to give him the chance and i will give him my full backing using all the experience i have gained over the years.

ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONEY.

Morning gents. Just wanted to explain my announcement yesterday in a little more detail. It basically comes down to the fact that this is my 5th season in charge and the fact that I'm finding other demands on my time which have always been there beginning to naturally take a bit more priority - evident in the number of games I've not managed to make this season so far, or have left half way through, etc... I think that me taking my foot off the gas has resulted in the team as a whole not hitting the same pace as we have for the last few seasons.

I think also that where we have been quite successful that there's a danger that given everything above, I'm maybe sat back on it a little bit. So I came to thinking that maybe it was time someone else took the reigns and drove the club on from here. Once I found that thought had entered my head, I was pretty much assured that it was therefore the right thing to do. I was going to keep hold of things for a little longer in the season, maybe til the New Year, but then it looks like I'm going to be missing quite a few games over the next 4 to 6 weeks and didn't think it was fair to desert the team like that, then come back for 2 games and retire then. That's why yesterday was the day.

As for the future, all I'm doing is retiring as manager, and other than the next 4 weeks, I shall be around just as much, training and playing/running the line/dressed up nice and warm... and here for Genghis to use to his discretion. I'll also be acting as a financial buffer until the end of the season, but everybody is going to have to get used to bringing subs with them on Sundays cos it's not fair to expect Genghis to sink the cost of the pitch and the refs like I have been - it's been my choice to do that, I'm not moaning, just saying that that's one thing that will have to change.

And as for Genghis, I had no trouble in deciding to retire cos I knew that he was there ready to carry on, he's seen the way I ran the club and worked bloody hard alongside me, you can't argue about his commitment or his will to win and with everybody's backing and input I think he's the right choice to inject a bit of urgency back into the club which I think I've let slip this season. He'll no doubt make some fuck-ups, as I did, but he'll learn from them, as I (sometimes) did, but you know him, he knows you, so there's no reason you can't move on from here. The league is still wide open, but we're still not quite firing on all cylinders, so there's an opportunity there but work needed to take it. I'm going to be around for Genghis to discuss options/decisions with me, so if you find yourself doing a lot more running in recent weeks at training and maybe even after matches if we don't start looking a bit fitter, you can call that the Bellamy Legacy...

And yes, on Thursday nights I will still be there, still shouting as much as normal and still moaning if people aren't putting the effort in or playing the simple balls, just now you can tell me to fuck off...

I thought it was out next Friday? Ive cancelled my order so I can afford Barcelona!

Shane has that woman confirmed a time for today,and what is her name?

Just a reminder gents that GTA San Andreas is out today! I'm literally vibrating in anticipation...

And Mr. Green, lets not forget that those 'part time window cleaners', as you called them, are the Double Winning Champions from the Best Footballing Country in Europe...

Luckily, I am trained to deal with a man who comes at me with a Banana, or attempts to attack me with a whole host of other fruits, for that matter.



Monty Python, 'And Now For Something Completely Different', 1971

Can everyone bring a banana tonight please?

Are you sure that wasn't saint and greevsie that said its a funny old game, game of two halfs, a goal at each end??

And...

'Feeling FruityFrom The Sun: 'A footballer has been sacked for allegedly sexually assaulting a youth team player. Oxford United’s Julian Alsop is said to have tried to shove a banana up his backside as a prank went too far.''

Dear God...

http://www.football365.com/news/story_130845.shtml

As Bob Marley once said (probably), Its a Funny Old Game...

I agree with most of those facts John as much as it twist my lower intestines, But one thing i can't get..........Arsenal can't beat a bunch of second rate window cleaners from Greece. Go figure?

Arsenal, Imperious in the League, best striker in the World, best Midfielder in the World, one of the best Centre backs in the World, unbeaten in 49 league games, 5 points clear at the top already, 11 points clear of United.... could be that Vieira is out, Pires is out, Henry is out, Edu is out, Gilberto is out...

United are crap at the moment.

It will be 1-1.

Oh, sorry about the mini league, buggered that up a bit. At least I'll be able to finish first, second, and third.

Good shout Smurfy - Browny whack em on a CD and I'll be able to post em up on here. Or post em up yourself. Bet you've got rid of em haven't you? Be good for you to see them so you can have some memory of the Friday night, yours must all have got trashed with all that alcohol in your bloodstream.

Brownie is ther any chance at all that we may get to see your photos from Blackpool soon?

So what do you think the score's gonna be on Sunday then? General bewilderment sweeping through the Utd squad, Fergie trying every possible squad combination to see if they can snap out of it (Ruud in goal on Sunday I heard) and Arsenal bound to pick up a crucial injury tonight against Panathanakosathanaikokaikos.

My early hunch of a 3-0 away win is being tempered by the fact that although it's Arsenal, it's also still Utd, who might be a bunch of mugs, but are nobody's fools, if you can see the difference.

But it's Rooney's 19th birthday, the ugly little sh*t and he likes the big games and he likes notching against Arsenal, so who can say?

I'm going to hold my prediction til just before kick off to see what mood everyone's in on the day.

Yes mate, I think they break it down as far as 3rd place at the end of it, im only 14 points off the top. You get a case of beer for different things each week as well, like highest scorer biggest jump in the league. So all going wel, got a damm good side.

Not gona be at training on Thursday I got training course in London.

Sunday we're at home (Northcroft) to AFC Cholsey in the Berks & Bucks Cup. I've been looking at their results and after a poor start to the season they've begun notching a few points up in recent weeks, so we can expect a tough test.

4pm at the Halfway then for the Man U v Arsenal match on Sky

Unlucky for me, that weekend in december is no good for me as i'm going to centre parcs, Hope you guys have a good time. Are we at home on sunday?

You effing idiot Sillsy have you seen the Shefford FC mini-league table on scorecast?

btw Browny r u seriously 5th in the Sun comp overall? Not bad going my friend - do you get anything at all for finishing high up or is it just winner takes all?

Count me in on the Christmas bash sounds like fun. Might not make the game the previous week, as I’ve got a Burghclere Christmas do on the Saturday night.

The result Sunday was a great result and showed Great bouncebackability, the team pulled together when they needed too.

Sure can mate nice one cheers.

Friday is not a problem mate can i let you know what time on thursday.

Cool - Smurf are you free on Friday at all to meet that bird at Northcroft? If you can, name a time between about 11.30am and 1.30pm and she'll be there to meet you, give you a key, show you how to use it, etc...

That sounds spot on mate as i already gave the 20th booked off anyway

Sunday 19th December for the Christmas do this season okay with everyone?

Here you go lads click on this link turn up your volume and you can even scroll down the words karaoke style all you e-bay users will love and appreciate it.
www.geoffellis.com/ebay.html

www.lingeriechallenge.co.uk

be the first to play the next leisure suit larry viral game...

Hi Dan.

Crabbeman's right the league is totally wide open, early runners are Vodafone but they've played Blue Ball twice so that doesn't really count. We just have to concentrate on every single game from here on in - there's no Cold Ash, no TVS and no MDM from last season for us to go out maybe being afraid of (that said, we beat TVS without Smurf and drew with MDM last season) so it has the chance of being a very enjoyable season, promotion or not.

I see everyone's saying that Arsenal are going to sweep Man U aside on Sunday. That's what I thought until I realise everyone else was thinking the same. Should be a good game - did I read right that it's Rooney's birthday that day too?

From a Midfielders point of view..................I don't think the Tumble dryer passed enough for me, The cat looked in great form springing from save to save, And as the Iron curtain came down on precedings all that could be seen was the yellow skin of the crabbe and one almighty shadow from the genginator.

I dont where 7 i think my free kicks may need a bit of work but i wouldnt mind a go on rebecca loos!!! Great BOUNCEBACKABILTY yesterday boys it was a good team performance i didnt think anyone had a bad game. We responded really well to some very dodgey decisions [note henick changing room number 9!!!] most teams would not have been able to respond the way we did i really hope we can go on from here as it looks like the league is up for grabs

well done everyone

I only cast on the Sunday and Monday games,

Great result yesterday chaps, we showed some serious Bouncebackability. Which was good to see after going 2-0 down.

If anyone is interested and does the Sun Dream team im 5th out of the whole country and only 11 points of top spot. £300,000 thanks very much.

Great result yesterday chaps, we showed some serious Bouncebackability. Which was good to see after going 2-0 down.

If anyone is interested and does the Sun Dream team im 5th out of the whole country and only 11 points of top spot. £300,000 thanks very much.

I only cast on the sunday and monday games i forgot to do, i remembered saturday afternoon about 1 and by then it was to late to cast.I will be back

Smurfy bombs out in scorecast dropping to 130-something whilst Bellers flies up to the 70's.

Did you not cast on all the games mate?

I tell you what lads, an own goal and the worst penalty decision I've ever seen would often be enough to see us drop to a 5 or 6 goal degeneration. From what I saw yesterday, people were finally back to producing what they could. Don't get me wrong, we still have some distance to go, as the football we played as a team was still not what it used to be, but individually we had players back to their former standards, and that was enough to sweep MDM aside.

Special mentions...

Genghis: What most impressed me yesterday was the way Genghis changed his game to cope with who he was up against - that's the mark of a good defender. Genghis got tight earlier on but found himself skinned a couple of times cos the guy had good early pace, so he tweaked his game and defended by standing a yard further off him, making the distance past him that little bit too far for the guy to make. Genghis couldn't then stop him passing the ball, but with everyone else doing their jobs he often found he had no one to pass to and the danger down our right hand side stopped. If I didn't think that was just Genghis being back to his own standards, I'd have voted for him in man of the match.

Crabbeman: Again I didn't vote for him in man of the match cos he's his own worst enemy and did what I've come to rely on from him. He was everywhere, screaming at and for everything, breaking everything up (in partnership with Sillsy) in the key area of the pitch where they were trying to play football and forcing the game out wide where Paul, Genghis, Beeny, Jamie and Browny soaked it up and pushed forward. To be fair to Crabbeman he's never given any less, just yesterday it seemed to click in and be more effective.

Paul: Have to take my hat off to him - I was doing better than I expected to do, but still needed to sit the odd move out to recover before joining in the next play. Paul seemed to grow as the game went on (partly from being able to foray forward cos of Genghis working well behind him) but as the game swung our way Paul was a key factor in making that swing count, joining every attack and finally notching one for himself and rarely, if ever, being caught out to leave Genghis exposed.

Lewis: One early shot way off target, then sparked into life again, setting me up with a peach of a ball, scoring a goal that crushed a whole team and then setting up Crabbeman and Dan for their goals. You can't ask for much more than that, other than that early shot. He's shit.

As a team, great character shown by everyone, some nice attacking football in the final third and some quality defending, glimpses of the iron curtain again in the second half when we never really looked in danger of conceding.

Shane Bellamy, 10:04 am, Changing Room No. 9, Henwick : -

'I've been chatting this Ref up all week lads, so I expect some decisions to go our way today'

10:52, Henwick Pitch No. 10 : - The Ref gives the most dubious penalty in the History of Shefford F.C. ...

Bouncebackabilibblasiybblabty What a word, If you get a booking a pint for everyone I think would be in best of order !!

BOUNCEBACKABILITY TOMORROW BOYS AND MAYBE A BOOKING!!!

Fair point - FHM told us we had to pay, then suddenly there it was at no.6 - viral power you see, you can't fight popularity, you can only kill it with slurs about beastiality...

12/10/2004 - Shane - 'You have to pay to get onto the FHM thing - not as cool as it sounds eh? Same for the Lycos viral chart, it sucks the big one. It's not about the most popular stuff, it's about who's got the wonga.'

15/10/2004 - Butt Bongo Babes appears at number 6 on FHM Top 10 games...

True Beanie, I think the squad is about right at the moment, and if Dan is playing as a striker, we have cover in all positions.

Any news on Adam for Sunday?

Two sausage sarnies and a cup of tea later and I'm back!! Shane I think you misunderstood me the other day when i said is any of the saturday team where signing for us, I'm kinda against anyone else signing for us as our squad is pretty good and our bench is also better than most.

Is there a lunchtime Blogging break or something?!

Fair point John, I can't explain it, they said we had to pay, next thing we knew it was up there at number 6! Not complaining about it, bring it on.

And beeny I knew what you were getting at the other day, so I just wanted to explain to everyone that I'm also not interested in getting other players and explaining my reasons why. We don't need anyone else, we just need the players we have to play like they can play, say what they wanna say, do what they wanna do Adams Family. Do do do, click click...

A Career in Audio Imaging beckons, I think...

Im gonna be sitting here waiting all day for them arent I. Arent I?!?!

3,5,7,9 why are they never on time!! taadaa!! We hate dhl. we hate dhl. we hate dhl. we hate dhl. we hate dhl. we hate dhl. we are the dhl haters. Cool. I rock!!

Cheers Beanie, makes the wait better. Although I cant help feeling the chant somewhat tails off after the odd numbers...

Sorry john never had the unfortunate experince of use DHL (go faster lettering) but I will start a dhl hate club with ya. 2,4,6,8 who do we really hate "DHL" 3,5,7,9 da da doop da.

Sorry, DHL (go faster lettering)

Its gonna have to be a big tumble drier.

Anyone else hate DHL?

Crabbeman + innocent? Not a pair of words usually found in a sentence without "far from" as well.

Are there any tumble driers at Henwick? I think this is gonna take some organisation.

I'm sure I can arrange for Crabbeman to get booked, all I need to say is "Dave you're playing today" but as for the drier and tricking Smurf to get into it, that's gonna require a bit of thought.

Smurfy, how do you fancy lift to the Halfway after the match on Sunday? Trouble is, I've got something really secret in my car, so you'll need to wear a blindfold...

The only innocent party here is crabbman, oh and the tumble drier, it doesn't even know that smurfs gonna get in. (ouch)!

No, well, yes, but he has to get in not realising that its a tumble drier, then we have to accidentally turn it on, not realising its he is in there. Then Crabbeman has to get a booking.

So, to recap, on Sunday, Smurf's got to get in a tumble drier?

No No No More like this
...
..
....
...
...
The cat's got in.............................
..
...
...
Goal kick
.
...
...
..
..
...
..What's a tumble dryer
...
...
...
...
..
..
..That's a booking crabbman

I resent that comment Mr Bellemy. It would have been more like this...

'The Cats got in the Tumble Drier!

Quick, throw something at the On/Off button!

Oh no, the winds caught it and turned it up to a higher speed!

Ouch!

That a Booking Crabbeman.'


Or....

'Give the Cat to Lewis, he can give it to one of the midfield to look after. Oh no, he has kicked it really hard from miles out and sent it flying into the river, sorry, the tumble drier.'

Our midfield wouldn't have been anywhere near the incident.

"The cat's got in the tumble drier!"

...

...

...

...

...

"Eh? (wheeze)"

...

...

...

...

...

"OUCH!"

"That's a booking Crabbeman"

I must admitt I can quite see it from a midfielders point of view. Good point there mr.sills

Well, from a midfielders point of view,the tumble drier door was open, the person turned her back, the cat jumped in, she turned back round, shut the door and turned it on...

www.bongobabes.co.uk

I'll say no more.

Go to this link and select downloads then videos there are some cool stunts crashes and also a matrix cow. yes well for added fun look out for the human kite at the isle of man tt. www.superbike.co.uk

How the fuck do you accidentally put your cat in a tumble drier? Mind you, if the cat was gay, maybe it was for the best. My nan says they should all be put on a boat and sank, you know.

I affixed my cat with a "Do not tumble dry" label to stop silly accidents like that happening, I've also managed to avoid washing it at above 40 degrees, and have never ironed the fucker either. A stitch in time, that's my motto.

9.45am Henwick this Sunday, for those of you who still owe, scroll down to find out how much and bring dosh on Sunday, I am skint as fuck and this game puts me another £60 down...

I didn't know you refer to yourself as the cat smurf, Hmmm, you have nine lives you can spring and sit on top of fences and wind up old dogs, ok so far, you show your arse to the whole world and sometimes you eat your own sick. And after your done licking your own balls you want to lick your owners face. sounds like the life to me!!

Obviously, thats meant to say 'put their Cat in a tumble drier'. They didnt sit in a tumble drier, shouting 'The Cats Gay, The Cats Gay!!'. That would be silly.

Dont worry Smurfy, I was being sarcastic, as the Goalie position is our strongest area on the pitch! I would never want to replace the Cat.

However, someone at work did accidentally out their cat in their tumble drier last week. The Cat's Dead.

The Shefford FC mini league is now up on Scorecast... www.scorecast.co.uk

I did think that was a particularly brave move mentioning that position Mr Sills, but there you go.

Owen scored a header last night then, tried his best to hit it straight at the keeper but missed and it skimmed off his hip and into the net anyway. How he went from injured fifth choice Madrid striker to England captain I have no idea. I turned the Wales match on at 1-1 and figured that'd be a good score for us and then all of a sudden they were 3-1 down. Poland looked good coming forward but suspect under attack so it should be a good game when we play them next.

Almost 250,000 people have been sent that butt bongo babes game now. Just thought I'd let you know.

Oi Sillsy what you on about are you trying to get The Cat replaced

Current league form for AFC Cholsey can be viewed here - http://www.intheteam.com/home/home.asp?ClubId=5668

They're in the same league as Mortimer West End who we've had a couple of close games against in recent years in the B&B Cup, games we probably should have won but we lost (though one was with me in goal and we were 2-0 up and lost 4-2).

Currently AFC Cholsey are 3rd from bottom, having won 1, drawn 1 and lost 4. By all accounts that puts us as favourites, but we will need to deliver.

I don't really think we need any more players and won't be looking for any - but with all the players we have signed on, currently only 15 are available for action - so I wouldn't worry about the size of the squad too much. The thing to worry about is the quality of squad we now have available and the level of performance we're putting in, the two don't really match up at the moment so we need to turn that around rather than getting other players in.

This Sunday we've got MDM at home but we're playing at Henwick cos the fair's down at Northcroft and are leaving Sunday morning so that road will be virtually impassable.

Next round of the B&B Cup we have AFC Cholsey at home - just checking them out now...

Fair enough, he can bring a goal keeper along then. Or a right back ;-)

I'll be at training tonight, but I might be shit (insert 'no change there' joke here) as I wont have eaten since, well, now.

Not that any of you really care.

Oh John now thats not very nice is it, I quite like my place in the team!

Dont think we need anymore players James, especially not midfielders or defenders! Lewis is welcome to bring along as many strikers as he wants, though...

We all know how to talk a good game and on a thursday we can all pass and move, so why not on a sunday? We need to put in to matches what we put in practice. Shane is there gonna be any more of the saturday team that dave and dan play for signing for us?

Them again?! Shocking stuff, its just like as playing Cold Ash last year. They were wankers as well.

You're on Mr Smurf - especially with me being top 10 in the overall rankings I think my prowess will show through. I had a disatrous week with the international rankings, so it's about time my football genius showed through again. And I believe you about the signing on fee, I don't need witnesses - especially not Genghis!

Has everybody played Butt Bongo Babes yet? Just to give you an example of it's prowess, it was re-set live at around 3pm yesterday and by 9am this morning had been seen by over 30,000 people. It's appeared on viral sites such as www.joker-inc.com and been the subject of arguments on internet forums where geeks go to be heard.

New fixture list came through yesterday, we have MDM on Sunday and then potentially a match off and then guess who (again) the following week? That means Beenie misses another Trav Friend match cos he's banned...

Gentlemen, I have chanced upon a revelation. I have realised that I havent had my hair cut since pre-season, and things havent gone to well for us so far. So I therefore think it may be down to my Hair that we arent playing well. Therefore, I shall have it cut on Friday, and we can start winning and playing like the team we are again on Sunday.

Job Done.

Shane,have a look at that scorecast.co.uk look at positions 103 and 119 do you want a fiver bet, highest finisher of the month?

See Beenie if you wasn't a minger and joined our shower gang you might be in with a chance

Oh Sorry Smurf I always thought there was a little spark between us never mind my dreams are shattered (sniff)

Mr Bellamy, Ghengis will confirm my story concerning my signing on fee i paid £15 when we played Partick in the friendly at Stockcross.

Beenie what ever gave you the impression that you would be in with a chance with me anyway?

Also Mr. Sills sorry to Burst your bubble but you have always been a banker, ( pull the corners of your mouth apart to get desired affect) thank you!

Brownie I'm not wasting any more of BT's good money to tell you to F**K O** and stop sending me emails about prick losers who have a genetic science in proccesing and a square head module for being a stroker. Now hopefully that will stop you sending me them dam emails, also I'm not gay and I'm not interested in middle age men Brownie, (sorry smurf this means i don't fancie you). Get the message brownie or I'm sending the heavies to your office!!!!!

Are you serious about the FHM thing? Thats sh*t! It has been gtting steadily worse recently though, the games they give links to do seem to be more from proper games sites and less from one off things which are better. Oh well, my career in advertising was short lived. Back to Banking...

You have to pay to get onto the FHM thing - not as cool as it sounds eh? Same for the Lycos viral chart, it sucks the big one. It's not about the most popular stuff, it's about who's got the wonga.

Browny that's you owe me, but I'm still taking it off what I owe you, so when that figure hit's £40 then we're square.

Smurfy I haven't got you down as paying your signing on fee, but if you say you have then cool it's down to a tenner then.

Shane did you take out my signing on fee from my total?As i paid that

Dissapointed about Sunday, but as Im sure we all know that we can we bouce back, I think we have seen that its going to be a very close seanson this time around. Lets just all go out and show what we can do on Sunday against MDM.

Shane is that what you owe me or I owe you?

Like the game Shane. I mean, its not helping with my Revision at all, but still a good game.

Just a thought, and Im sure somehting you advertising bods already know about but every Friday FHM send out a 'Friday email' to about 250000 people, with new internet games and links on, and the best games get into their top 100 which stays on their web site. All it takes is for someone to email them about the link, and if they like it it will be on their email and reaching a hell of a lot of people each week. It seems like the sort of game they would like - women, slapping, and naked women. What do you reckon? I dont mind sending an email if you dont want to (im assuming if you email them, it will have your work address on and they will see it as you just trying to get free advertising).

www.bongobabes.co.uk - it's back live again now after we had to take it down over the weekend. Get to level 6 for the first reward video, then complete levels 10, 15, 20 and 25 for the other reward vids - level 25 gets you a vid of all 4 girls getting their kit off...

Well we'll see, I hope you're right, cos at the moment we're conceding over 2 goals per game on average in the league and scoring about the same, so we need to wake up soon.

Plus, while I'm in a grumpy mood about that result, here's what everybody owes at the moment, I want to get some cash in soon cos otherwise it gets a much bigger problem for you guys to have to find the money and if you add all this up it comes to over £300 which means at the moment I'm skint.

If you can bring some on Thursday or Sunday I'd be most grateful. The numbers below are everything, signing on for those who haven't paid yet, match fees, bookings and anything that was left over from last season...

ADAM - £7.50
BEENY - £44.00
BROWNY - £19.50
COLIN - £32.50
DAVE C - £5.00
DAVE L - £0 but only cos I'm paying off his footy boots at the moment until we're square
GENGHIS - £34.00
HILLY - £32.50
NEWY - £20.00
JAMIE - £7.00
DAVE F - £17.00
JOHN S - £6.00
MATT - £22.00
NEIL - £30.00 (the least he's ever owed)
PAUL - £37.00
SMURF - £25.00

Sorry to talk about money, I'd love to be able to not charge anything, but each home game costs me nearly £60.00 including the ref so I can't afford to keep shelling it out. At least away games are free!

MDM at home this weekend so if you're waiting for an easy game before we start playing to our actual level of ability, don't hold your breath. Last season we had a disappointing performance against them but only lost 2-0 and then a much better performance and were unlucky to only come away with a point. So there's no need to be scared, but every need to put the effort in.

Dont think sunday is anything to worry about lads just wish we would react better as a team to going behind as we have only done that once this season against post office and look at the result we got then. The good thing is that we have not played anywhere near like we no we can and the league looks to be wide open this season so if we can go on one of are shefford runs we will be right back in it

Fair point - hope you're right.

Last night was superb, will tell you all about it on Sunday, but basically was in a box next to Alan Shearer and Sienna Miller, was close enough to hear Andy Gray's commentary from the man himself and close enough to call Robbie Williams a cock and have him hear me. I didn't, but I was close enough to. I was a guest so didn't want to show my hosts up by shouting "COCK!" at a talentless fop.

The after show party was a little disappointing to be honest, down to the organisation at St James Park being amateurish and not used to hosting rich southerners who can afford more than one drink before they have to walk home. After queuing at the bar (next to Waddle and Grobbelaar) for 45 minutes to get a drink, then waiting even longer next time while someone else went to get their round, it all started to get a bit tense (& sober) and the joy of watching some surprisingly minging page 3 models, Dean Gaffney(?), the knobbish bloke from Hollyoaks, etc started to wear off.

Had a chat with Jayne Middlemiss about the embarassing farce that was Paul Gascoigne's half-time 'score from the halfway line' trick and had a chat with Ralf Little who seemed like a genuinely decent bloke and completely overwhelmed by the game and getting Man of the Match. Watched Calum Best make an arse out of himself and get instantly shunned by Harvey, the bird from Misteeq and the rest of the ligger crew. Sorry, the So Solid Crew. Saw Kluivert desperately trying to look like he belonged to the So Solid Crew and wasn't 'just a footballer' after all.

So the party was the suckiest bit, but all in all a bloody good night. Sienna Miller is officially hot stuff but I didn't get to talk to her, so I went back to my hotel room alone... Tried that RU21 stuff too and kinda think it works, have to try it again sometime. Tastes crap, but woke up feeling surprisingly decent for the amount of beer consumed.

Saying that, we have still had a better start than last season, and we do tend to be slow starters.

How was the VIP box at The Match? Bastard...?

I didn't see it go wrong so I'll have to take your opinions on it, but I think there are too many players not playing to their own standards recently and I reckon the main difference in the 2nd half would have been that they wanted to win and we had too many people who were just out for something to do on a Sunday morning. Was shocked to find out we'd conceded two goals without getting any ourselves after what I saw in the first half when we created a number of good chances, all that hard work gone to waste. We've got every chance of being up in the promotion spots this season but we can't afford to keep dropping points that really should be ours. We've played 4 league games now and have been capable of winning them all, instead we've only won 2. I might juggle positions a bit on Sunday, still thinking...

Not gonna have a go mate because what you say is right, but from a midfielders point of view, I hardly saw the ball in the second half because it kept flying over our heads, so there wasnt a lot we could do about it keep going back and forth, as it seemed to be going from our defence to their defence, then they passed the ball to their midfield who passed it to their strikers. We didnt seem to do that part. Then when we did get the ball and tried to create something, there wasn't many people around in their half to give the ball to to be honest!

Can't believe we let them beat us AGAIN! After the first half thought we were gonna beat them easy, It was really strange that our heads dropped at the start of the second half. We kinda abandoned our defense the back four had a really tough job. As they were clearing the ball it was coming straight back at them, Its funny watching from the sidelines apart from a little banter, You can see that what goes on on a thursday night seams to get left on a thursday night no two touch passes no movement no teamwork. sorry lads i know you guys are gonna have a go at me for saying all this. just hate losing to a team who are second rate argue with themselves and that we are so much better than them. Just my point of view. Also a little miffed i didn't get to play its bloody cold standing around in that wind.

http://www.bongobabes.co.uk

http://www.bongobabes.co.uk

http://www.bongobabes.co.uk

http://www.bongobabes.co.uk

http://www.bongobabes.co.uk

http://www.bongobabes.co.uk

Much appreciated Smurfy, but if any of the cheerleaders attack me you do not want to be in the line of fire if you see what I mean.

10am Brimpton on Sunday boys the division is wide open so let's be up for it and switched on.

Bellers do you need a body guard to accompany you i offer my services for free

It gets better Mr Crabbe - I have now just scored a ticket to the after-show party, meaning Ms Degg and I will be chatting, having a drink or two, generally getting to know each other... Might see if Bozzie can score me some marching powder too to help the evening go well...

You jammy git have you seen the cheerleaders on the match they are wourth the trip alone jacki degg is one of them!!! Well up for sunday we need to get revenge for are 5-0 mauling

I'll catch up with everyone tonight Paul and let you know about Saturday, I'm all up for it (don't worry too much about food though as will probably have a big lunch to soak up all the alcohol!

That said though, I might be driving as I have a heavy evening on Sunday as I'm being entertained by EIDOS in their executive box at St James Park for the final of The Match. Meaning I have to fly up Sunday afternoon meaning I may have to shoot off straight after the game against Chav Friend.

Hello Mr Crabbe nice to see you,
Hope every one is up for sunday be nice to get our league form going strong.
Any news on Frew and Craig?
When is Hand of God Beenie Suspended from?

Dont no if browny is going mate as he is ill i have got the day off do you want me to meet you when you finish work or can you pick me up?

Anyone know if Im driving the Reading lot to training tonight? Whats Browny up to? Is he coming?

...

Dave Lewis finally drags his ratio up to over 1 goal per game. Although I could have subbed him after 2 minutes on Sunday and still had the same result. Jamie Taylor with two convincing performances has put himself in pole position for the Man Of The Match scores and top spot on the points per game on the Man Of The Match ratings too. An inspired signing by top manager Shane Bellamy... A coincidence that since Jamie moved into the back 4 we've only conceded one goal in 180 minutes of footy? I think we should make him mayor.

We're away to Travellers Friend on Sunday, they play up at Brimpton, so we'll meet there at 10am.

I'm up for the 16th Neil, and I guess we'll catch up tomorrow night about what's going on on Saturday for the England v Wales game...

Is anyone up for coming out on my birthday. Its Saturday 16th?

Good morning lovely boys,congratulations on sunday who scored the goals then? Were they really shit.
Would Browny get in their team?

Only joking Browny anyway i hear they have a great linesman.

Who have we got sunday and Where?

room room room room room

room room room room room

Pay attention Mr Sills.

No im going to training tomorrow, Mr Sills I just wanted you to pick me up on the way to Picking up crabbeman. I don't mind driving or I can direct you.

No im going to training tomorrow, Mr Sills I just wanted you to pick me up on the way to Picking up crabbeman. I don't mind driving or I can direct you.

No i dont mind driving us up there mate, i will be there on Thursday and I wont be going home.
All I wanted was for you to pick me up from work on your way through to our place.

No i dont mind driving us up there mate, i will be there on Thursday and I wont be going home.
All I wanted was for you to pick me up from work on your way through to our place.

Cheers. I think Browny wants me to drive him on Thurs, so Im hoping he doesnt want me to drive us up to Park House then drive him home again straight away, I wont be impressed.

Turn left onto the A34 heading south.

Filter left into Newbury.

Go through the town centre until you reach the roundabout next to Halfords and Burger King - turn right.

Go straight across the next roundabout up Andover Road.

You'll reach the two mini roundabouts, go straight over both and the entrance to Park House school is just up there on your left hand side.

Alternatively get Browny to give you a lift and then f*ck off...

No punching without glass? No much point in that case.

Dont suppose any of you lot can give me direction from the M4, jct 13, to Park House School...

Be nice to have a few bevvies and watch the game together eh? If you're happy to have us round Paul it's probably better than AFC Newbury with their 'no sound' rule and other unnamed Newbury pubs with their 'no punching without broken glass' rule...

Im suppose to be playing footy saturday, but if you are all doing something im sure I can give it a miss.

I'll be in London to watch it, but I'll want to be home nice and early to give my all on Sunday morning, so I hope the match doesnt Drag-on...

(Boom Boom)

where';s everyone watching the England game on Saturday? Fancy a Shefford get together/session to carry the flag against the Welsh enemy? By god they produce some good bands, but hopefully they'll have a (ahem) leeky defence...

(my coat...)

Post Office, apparently, beat MDM at the weekend. Looks like it's going to be a messy season, picking up points here and there, losing games you might not expect but watching other teams do the same. We just have to give it our all in each game and see what comes of it. Looks like anybody is beatable but anybody is capable of beating too. Rollercoaster season ahead...

It was a good result, but like you say it was hard to keep playing to our level. Sometimes we would have the ball and have so much time on the ball it was rediculous, you lose that instinctive edge to your game and try to play passes that you wouldnt normally play. Still, 8 goals in two games is a good confidence boost. Bring on Travellers.

Before I comment on the game yesterday, I just want to apologise publicly (Blog-icly) to Paul for subbing him off yesterday. Paul always reacts a bit if he hears his name called out to come off, just cos he wants to play as much footy as possible, which is fine I don't mind that, but yesterday I got it wrong - I thought he had played the full 90 last week, it was only after the game that I found out that he'd been subbed then too. In which case, in normal circumstances I wouldn't have subbed him, I'd have looked at someone else to make way for Browny, and as Browny is fairly versatile, that could have been one of about 5 or 6 other players. With a squad our size there's no major reason for someone to come off two weeks in a row, so that was my f*ck up. As it was Paul had had a stormer of a first half and was doing the same, maybe looking a little tired but as we know even when he looks tired he can still pop up with a goal or two. So I just wanted everyone to know that he's not an automatic choice to come off when subs are about to be made and if it seems that way after the last couple of games then that's cos I hadn't caught up with Genghis properly after the win against Shalbourne. There.

So anyway, good game yesterday gents. Nice easy victory, I was a little disappointed in Bell FC, I thought they might at least test us a bit, but there you go. We kept our energy levels up as much as possible but did get dragged down to their level a bit going forward, just cos the marking was so poor that we were trying to score too quickly in a move. But good to see that we never lost our concentration at the back - I wasn't joking when I said I wanted no shots in the full 90 minutes and I think I can allow you the one scuffed attempt in the first half cos he'd have had to have hit it perfectly to get it in from where he was, so that was excellent to see. Cleanest sheet I've ever seen I think. Even my gloves were clean.

Good to see Neil get off the mark too, with a typically confident penalty. And our first goal of the season contender with Dave's second goal.

Bit of shooting practice required at some point, as after being 2 up inside 2 minutes, we should have really been pushing for double figures there, but we'll take the win and hope for another exotic away trip in the next round...

Excellent news there then mr bellamy, thank goodness, £23 quid I'll take that with a seven day ban anyday. cheers for the info I'll pay up next week. Good luck sunday boys.

Here's a map, with directions and a badge. 

Okay - Game on. Directions are as follows:-

From Newbury, take the A34 North and come off at Chilton onto the A4185.
Then turn left onto the A417 heading towards Wantage.
Once in Wantage turn right onto the A338 heading North towards Grove.
Eventually turn left into Main Street in Grove.
Then 3rd left into Cane Lane.
The pitch is in Grove Rugby Club on your left hand side.
Changing rooms are in the Scout Hut which you get to by walking past the Rugby Club building.

Be there for 9.45am.

Reading lot - Crabbeman, Sillsy, Browny - I assume you're going to meet us all there.

Newbury & others - up to you, you can meet at Vicky Park and head up there, go yourself or meet in Shefford if you like which is the A338 anyway...

Let me know.

No, I've tried calling Dave Piper twice this morning but am getting no answer. Will try the Berks & Bucks now...

Well Beeny you're a reasonably lucky man. Other than a £23 fine you have just a 7 day ban which runs from a Monday to a Monday so you only miss one game - 31st October. Fixture list doesn't run that far yet so I can't tell you what game you miss, but at least it's only 1 match not the 5 or 6 I was fearing.