I didn't get a text invite either! Its like waiting to see if you have Live8 tickets! Beeney, are you sure you sent the text to anyone?! Because it seems you might not have got any replies because noone got the invitation!

Beeny puts himself in the running for the first game's Man Of The Match vote winner...

Sorry Beeny I didn't mean to cause such a backlash. Plus it does seem that Smurf (Manager) and Matt (Psychotic Killer) are the two people to take the most offense. Oh dear.

I didn't even get invited...! Bloody charming that is!

Grrr...

Yea Beenie i didnt want to go either and dont pretend to not have my number as i spoke to you the other day and you have my personal and work mobile.

You selfish so and so.

Hi Matt

Don't wanna go anyway Beeny actually. Actually. Don't need a gay cruise to buy beer, we have a Tescos in Andover you know. And it's jammed full of chavs. But thanks for the offer, hope you have a great time.

Watch out for sailors offering rum. Or Ashley offering you rum.

First training next Wednesday - I'd got myself all fit but have let it all go to pot. Fuck.

Thas ok Matthew as you will lose plenty of weight next season........................

Running the line !

I'll have a bet that more beer goes down my throat than food.

...and if your manager I can't get moaned at for being hungover. Hypocrite!

Thats right Matthew but i bet you eat hell of a lot more than a lettuce leaf.

Oh Oh is that the Fat Matt arguement rising again

Cool, the halfway's a good shout. Relaxing. Calm. Peaceful surroundings. No need for me to get uptight and angry.

Of course everyone is invited but the only two people that got back to me so far was crabbe and ash sent out a multi text to everyone but no replys had a look into it and its £48 a cabin leaving around the end of september but its probably over a weekend so would have to work it around football, maybe do it in the week, if people are interested then numbers would be a good idea! if your interested then i can look deeper into it and sort out dates deposits and stuff!

Let me know!

Beeny. Booze Cruise. Everyone invited? Charming.

It's at The Halfway. There will be a choice from a set-menu in advance and it will cost you £15 for the meal. That way there's no faffing about with "I only had a lettuce leaf" and all that crap. If you only want a lettuce leaf, best to bring it with you and eat it before you come in. Everyone can then just pay for their own drinks at the bar and everybody's happy.

As for what goes on after that - dunno really, we can get taxis into town and stuff, just see how everyone feels eh?

7.30pm Saturday 23rd it is then.

Im with you on this one Beeny no idea where we are going either, im guessing just on past presentation nights that it is at an indian somewhere in Newbury, I,e Nawab or something like that. Ill be bringing my Mrs along Smurf if that ok.

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Are you saying that all the people that 'tag along' are from Reading?!?! Nigel is in the USA so wont be coming, Craig would probably break his leg ten minutes before getting on the train even if he did want to come, poor lad, and Colin, well, Colin will probably sit on a table on his own or wait outside for us. I'll try to sort him out...

I don't know where the presentation is being held, I know its at a table?? But where illustrious leader??

Wonder what you mean, but thanks for joining in.

Good the table is booked then, Still wondering where missed the blog on where it is!

Well I'm glad we're all calmed down.

Table is booked for the 23rd. We're limited to 20 people because of the area of the restaurant we're going into, so if you can let me know if you're coming and if you'd like to bring a lady-friend guest that's fine. No additionals this time I'm afraid, so your nigels, colins, craigs, etc are gonna have to miss out. If we go over 20 on the players and girls then I'll have to think of something innovative. Like women are only allowed in the presentation area if they're partner is collecting an award... Or women allowed in if they're clothing doesn't take up much room... Women only allowed on laps, no spare chairs...

Yeh - reflexing on my comments I guess that was a little harsh. Although they would probably arrest me for my poor quality of dancing, before the arson attack.

Girlfriends are allowed, though we're limited on numbers this year, but as most of you lot couldn't pull a hamstring I'm not over-concerned.

Matt the bit people got confused about as to whether you were serious or not was the bit where you wrote, and I quote...

"I'm gonna burn all your houses down and dance on the ashes if you so much as look me in the eye"

Just seemed a bit harsh considering Sillsy had written, and I quote...

"Hello Matt, how are you?"

I'm still baffled as to which part of my post was taken seriously!

I won't stab Smurf before the season starts, we'll never get another manager in time for the new season.

Ello Browny...

Shocking stuff, didnt realise you'd be able to make it on Wednesdays mate. Lets change the day again.

Only joking of course, dont let fly like matt, I hid under my computer when I read what he had put.

I think you can bring girlfriends Browny, how will you choose though?!

Lots been going on in here, been quiet for a while. 23rd is cool with me. Is this lads only or are Girlfriends allowed? Training on a wednesday is much better with me as I can actually make it this year now that i drive to work.
Need to get my fitness back up to scratch, starting to use the gym again.

looking forward to training and the new season.

Who invited the lanky kid boasting about winning speech's eh eh? Just cos his couz is the manager, favoritism is a bitch!

Hi guys, just thought I would join in this exciting chat room. Is there been a date set yet for the presentation night cause I will have to make sure I have my winning speech ready. I hear smurf has been watching his football coaching videos again ready for this year, should be a good year!!!
Ash

Don't say yes Smurf, he'll stab ya.

Now I'm waiting for the bombardment of the fat bird jokes !!

Are all these course going to put the signing on fee up? !

And i have signed him up for weightwatchers.....................Only joking Matt honest

It's ok everyone i've signed Matt up for anger management classes. Can't have him coming on here giving it Mr Charlie Big Potato.

Yeah, this bloke didn't need much persuading to give you a bash. Although it was a few years ago now, so someone might have got there own back by now!

I apologise for my previous posts! I was just having a laugh, but now it seems as if people think I was having a dig! I'm very sorry....

23rd is fine with me.

my holiday mission is to get kicked out by the long haired greasy bouncer i dont think i will have 2 many problems

What? Eh? Lets just leave it, yeah?

Table at 7 on the 23rd is so clodse to perfection it hurts...

Guess i missed that bit but a table where shane?

It is believed that the first settlers on Zakynthos came in the 16th century BC from the Peloponnese.

Personally, I don't believe it, but more people than me do, so there you are.

Looking forward to next Wednesday, be good to get out in the light evenings and run around a bit...

Err... I was only messing about! As far as I'm aware you didn't hit a nerves! Although that would have been your first shot on target for a while! Hilarious I know.

We went to Zante a few years ago. There's a place called Cocktails Dreams with this
greasy long hair bouncer that walked round with a big torch, and anyone causing trouble he whacks them and throws them down about 25 iron stairs till you hit the pavement.... Nice bloke!

There's another cool place that sets the bar on fire and throws buckets of ice at the roof every hour! Random I know. It's a pretty mental place!

matty think i hit a nerve there im sorry no really!!!! the 23rd is cool with me i may even have a tan as i will be in zante the week before actually you dont get a tan at the bar do you!!!!

If I book a table for 7pm on 23rd July can everyone make that?

Beached Whale... Been called worse, so I'll take that as a compliment.

I spent months trying to talk Browny into letting me come training with Shefford. Then Smurf was at my first training session, and Browny had to convince me to come back !!

I'm not sure what your trying to get at Sillsy... Are you trying to say Hilly and Smurf are so awesome it's impossible to drop them 'or' accusing the management of ignoring your talents, and deliberately dropping you...?

Are you calling the management racists?

Because at the moment your saying Hilly and Smurf don't train and do play. And that you do train and don't play (as often as you'd like), and that just makes you sound shit!

I'll await your reply. See if you can beat 'Beached Whale' !!

I can't make the 6th July but will be there the following week.

Mr Sills was your last blog an attempt to lick my Arse ?
I will have you know i once trained 2 weeks on the trot

Just read your ridculous suggestion atkins although i am going bald and have a ridculous amount of chest hair i would like to see you last longer than me it would be like watching a beached whale!!!!!

Not everyone is going to be able to make training, but I think the most important thing is that Smurfy is there.

I wouldnt worry to much about not being able to make it at the moment Mikey, Hilly and Smurf never never came, and they're two of our best and most 'capped' players...! Conversely, I turn up every week...

Basingstoke Bingo.

"Two hundred fat ladies..."

Yes please.

Did you want to play next season Matt ?

Basingstokes Bingo night is on a Thursday night then is it?

Well i definitely cannot do Thursdays so i am going to have to stick with the official announcement sorry if i upset anyone.

I apologise for my spelling errors!

With my gut how it is Silly, 5 paces are more realistic for the 6th July, although I will consider giving you a slight head start. Crabbe used to be a contender in the fitness race, but I think he's past it these days!

Do you get fit doing Kung Fu then Mikey? Lewis spends his weekends throwing his arms, legs and head around nightclubs, and he's not very fit.

Not sure what to say then as Mon,Tues are to early after a game,Thursdays i cant do and Friday is to close to a game.So feedback welcome.

Glad you agree Shaner...

ridiculous

Matty, was that meant to say '10 paces ahead of Sillsy'?

If it was, i'm not sure whats more ridiculous, your attempts at typing, or the notion that you would ever be that far ahead of me, if ahead at all! Im gonna teach you a lesson on July 6th...

I'm going to struggle to carry my belly around 1 murder run, let alone anymore. Although I'll still be 10 paces ahead a Silly.... As always.

Nice one Smurf. I've been looking forward to getting back into the swing of the Shefford clan.

Or 'massive' - just for you Browny. Init.

Officially Smurf is now the current manager of Shefford FC. There will still be a handover at the presentation evening, but that's just for ceremony's sake, especially as that will happen after training starts - no point Smurf stood there telling people what to do at training and some clever dick saying "but you're not manager, yet..."

So as of the AGM (Tuesday this week) Smurf became Shefford FC Manager.

However, as last season's managers, Genghis and I will preside over most of the presentation evening. Plus it makes me feel important.

Blimey txt messages from the new manager already, I have a feeling he's gonna be a hard task master. Wouldn't wanna be sat there at half time 5-0 down...

OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT ( If i am in the position to make them yet )

TRAINING FOR SHEFFORD FC SEASON 2005/2006 WILL COMMENCE WEDNESDAY 6th JULY AT 7PM.

Wednesdays at 7pm is good for me.

Pint in the LSB is good for me.

Atkins doing my murder runs is good for me.

Lesbian twins, good for me.

Ha Ha Ha Mr Murder Run Atkins

7:02pm

So can i say Wednesday is now the official training night ?

Shall we say 7 o'clock ? Or any other time suggestions ?

Wednedsdays are good for me. The sooner then better, especially with the weather as it is. I should be able to sweat out some of the excess stones I've put on.

...and then we can go for a pint in the LSB beer garden like we used too!

be good to see if we can sort the stuff out with miller cos it'd be great to have him - sadly it's a league rule which they will enforce if he owes PO any money still, they don't like that.

Thanks for handling all that on your own Smurfy, and well done for joining a long line of Shefford managers for giving Jim Wild stick - wish I'd been there to see it, I saw Genghis nearly deck him so you're obviously off to a good start.

Wednesdays are fine for me too. I can do Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday actually, but as Wednesday has started as a strong contender, I'm ok for that.

league should be good next year well up for it already i will have a word with miller any idea how much he owes??? as they are probably being wankers cause he is sighning for us. Wednesday is good with me

Good work Smurfy, sounds like an interesting night! Cant wait to start playing again, I know we can have a really good season this year.

How abouts Wednesdays for Training? Middle of the week etc. I cant do Tuesday's, but thats about it.

Bring on Hermitage reserves...

Think yourselves lucky, as we nearly got hoisted up into the Prem! Now that would have been a tough old season...

Totally new division then really this season. Should be interesting.

That's not fair, last time I saw slap head he didn't buy me a pint, and I was stood at the bar. He just shock my hand and said "Ha ha. we got promoted".

Were you staring at him with your fists clenched, teeth gritted and dribbling?

Division 2

Blue Ball
Shalbourne ( Career ruining bastards )
Newbury Post Office Reserves
The Swan
Meadway
Berkshire Arms
Revolutions
L.M.P
Q Associates
Wagon And Horses
Slug And Lettuce
Bucklebury

Slug And Lettuce: Geoff Neville and a load of old St Barts players
Revolutions: A team coming from Reading Freiendly league playing Doui Abbey
Q Associates: A team made up from Thatcham Cricket club
LMP: A lot of WKD old players
Just some info i accuired last night

Shirt Numbers next season can now be up to any number obviously no two numbers the same.

Substitutes: 5 can be named 3 can be used from the named 5

League entry fees and referees fees remaining the same as last season

Cup competions are only £1 to enter this season

The Benevolent cup will be an invitational competition teams who fulfill all their fixtures early will be invited to participate in the Benevolent Cup.

If Andy Miller is to sign he needs to settle his outstanding debts with Newbury Post Office which i was informed last night is a substantial amount.( Stamp money apparantley )

2005/2006 Season will commence 4th September 2005

I have got 2 friendlies in pipe line at moment with Partick ( slap head bought me a pint last night ) And Newbury Post Office First Team

Will be making more enquires and getting dates will be looking at Friendlies middle/end of July.

Start training Start of July dates to be confirmed and i need a day that we can train,i can make any day but Thursdays give me your feedback.

Cold Ash have a new manager too, as the old one quit! The new manager is the manager of the OLA Saturday team, there really good and he'll probably bring some of them in to play.

The Wagon and Horses are in the 2nd with all the new teams according to Smurf, so they were obviously just hoping they would be in the 1st. New Thatch, Henwick, Banks and Mobile Streams have been put into the 1st Div. Partick, Vodaclone and MDM have been moved into the Premier League. 12 teams in each league... (Just doing Smurfs report for him!). Shalbourne and Blue Ball still got relegated. Even thou 3rd and 4th got promoted from the 2nd!

I'm assured Henwick are going to be up there as they have loads of new players. I know half there team and there all a bunch of c*cks.

Miller (Post boy) can't sign for us yet, as apparently he owes PO loads of dosh.

Me and Adam miss the 1st game of the season as we're on holiday.

I'm going to do some works, as no one is paying there tax and I'm fucking busy!

Morning all had a bit of ( Friendly ) banter with Mr Wild and he stuggled to answer the arguement mainly regarding all new teams being thrown in to any division and not starting from scratch a vote was carried out and all new teams will commence the season in Division 2,as will Bucklebury who were re-elected.
Here is the layout for next season:

Premier Division

Hermitage
Cold Ash
Kings Head
Brimpton
Falkland
Thames Sport
Kennet
Burghclere
Partick
Vodafone
MDM


Division 1

Hampstead Norreys
SHEFFORD
Chav Friend
Newbury Post Office
Westwood
New Thatch
Hermitage Reserves
Red House
Henwick
Bayer
Banks
Mobile Streams

Losing 2-0 to Cold Ash is no shameful result, especially with an outfield player in goal, so they should be quite a tasty team then.

Great.

I sense a good cup run this season.

23rd is fine, counting the days already. Cant wait to hear Smurf's take on the AGM...

23rd is fine for me, jt and Tony. There the onlt people I have spoken too.

Don't go causing any trouble tonight Smurf !!

I know of one new team that has been voted into the 1st div (apparently). There calling themselves The Wagon & Horses. I know most of them and they should be pretty good. Although they lost to Cold Ash 2-0 in a friendly, but they has an out-field player in goal.

Cool - no that all sounds good - I'll wait and see what Smurf says after tonights AGM and then if necessary I'll give the B&B FA a shout. All sounds fine though.

23rd July ok for everyone for the pres evening then? I'll assume it is if I hear no different from anyone...

Pre-season training is up to Smurf, let him get to the AGM tonight to find out when they expect the season so start and what div we're in etc and then he can decide what's what.

So is that date final for the presentation evening then? And when are we going to start pre season training?!?!

Genghis/Smurf what's the deal with Shefford and registration for the league? I've had a form come through to me and don't know whether to bin it or fill it in...

It was great mate - very fulfilling. The kids don't have radiation sickness or anything, but they have associated health problems due to the long term effects on the land from the fallout. They don't get any fresh fruit, veg, milk, etc... Consequently, one of the 9 year old girls was only slightly taller than my 4 year old niece. Dead cute though, they were terrified of the scuba diving but determined to give it a go.

Has anyone heard from Neil? Haven't had his votes in and am obviously aware that he might not be joining us again next season - anyone know what his thoughts are at the moment. If he's not going to vote then that's fine, just need to know, cos in which case I have all the votes in. Exciting eh?

How was you diving yesterday Mr Bellamy ?
Did the water glow when they jumped in ?

Balls - stupid Outlook calendar showing me a fake Saturday.

Ok - 23rd then?

Hello

2nd And the 16th are no good for me Going to live8 on the 2nd and a wedding on the 16th but the sunday is cool, have to book off the monday though, far to much drinking that weekend!

17th is fine for me...but thats a Sunday, is that the plan, or should it be the 16th?

Ok so if I put a tentative date of 17th July up - ok for everyone?

I can make all Saturdays in July, though I'd prefer it not to be the 23rd. But will be there if it is. Just spoke to Lewis and he's ok for anything in July.

I can make most Saturdays I think, not the first one in July though. Johnny Lamb said to let him know so he can mosey on down.

saturday the 18th next saturday in fact i can't do but any other is cool!

www.juiceherup.com

Check it out - we made this viral vid...

Okay in terms of votes I'm waiting for:-

Dave Lewis
Jamie Taylor
Tony
Dave F (if he's going to vote)
Neil (if he's going to vote)

So if anyone can give them a kick up the arse and get them to email me if they need a form sending through, that'd be cool.

Genghis and I will start looking at a venue/date/time - so any Saturday's that people definitely can't do from the start of July, let me know.

Shane if poss could you email two forms one to my email and one to simons as we would like to vote.

Emails are simon.3.hill@bt.com
james.3.green@bt.com


Thanks mate!!

Yep, I will do...just as soon as I receive it...!

I can't be a dear, not enough legs and I get scared in forests. Ahahahahaaa. Ok I'll send you a form - do me a lemon and send it round to the reading lot so they've got them too...

I havent got a form Shane, could you be a dear and send me one?

Dowie is better looking though

Ian Dowie eh... At least you didn't look out of place.

Thought I'd say it before someone else did!

hey all, Im back from the sweltering heat that is Dubai.
So i come back and find that Liverpool win the champions league and Crabbeman is in star wars. Strange!!!!

Holiday realy good mixing it with premiership footballers, none other than John Terry, Eidur Gudjohnsen, Ian Dowie. Would recommed it to anyone.

So whats the news on presentaion evening have we set a date yet?